You’ve already been on 2 pretty good dates! You found each other interesting and funny enough to feel like there is more to be uncovered. It could even lead to – fingers crossed – the committed relationship you are dreaming about.

This is all excellent and all you need now is to figure out how to take it to the next level. You’re probably thinking “please help me now to screw this up :-)’. Or even better ‘how do I know he’s into me?’.

As my favorite author Esther Perel puts it in her excellent book Mating in Captivity, ‘eroticism resides in the ambiguous space between anxiety and fascination’. This means when we are attracted to someone we worry about what they think of us and, at the same time, we are unable to stop thinking of them.